And so the story continues...

I've been putting on this front. That I'm this "player". I mean yes, I'm talking to a couple of girls right now. That's not what I want. I don't want to have meaningless sex. I'm not a dude, I can't just fuck anyone. So what I'm a softy with some stuff. At the same time I admit I'm fucking scared as hell to get into another relationship. I never been so weak and vulnerable until I was in one. It's like giving someone the power to destroy you. At the same time I never felt like I had so much purpose. I had more of a initiative to do well and be successful because not only was I doing it for myself, I was doing it for her too. Don't get me wrong I thoroughly enjoy being single. I like that there is no commitment and I get to test my waters. I just hope I don't change too much where I'm not the same person who appreciates every little part of love, even the bad. Lately its like I see these woman, and they just disappoint me. The way they act, it's like they're men. The quality that I love about woman is just fading away. Compassion, Respect, and Loyalty are a few things I really cherish about a girl. Now I barely see it. Today the Tweet Topic was #mynext, and all I could think was wow. Whoever my next is I'd make her the happiest girl in the world. I'm sure I'd fuck up occasionally like say something stupid or forget to do something. But the things I'd do wrong I'd spend as long as it takes making it up to her so she's happy and content before she rests her head at night. But I'm thinking that wont be for awhile :] BESIDES!!!!!!!!! I GOT A HALLOWEEN PARTY COMING!!!! It's going to be crazy!!! <33